Mitt & Ann Romney on stage at the Republican National Convention following Ann’s speech last night.
After being postponed a day due to Hurricane Isaac, the 2012 Republican National Convention is finally underway, y’all! Even though it’s only been a day, so much has happened. A Black CNN camerawoman was harassed by a convention attendee who threw peanuts at her and said, “This is how we feed animals.” Because this jackass wanted her to know that he went to the Disney school of how to be a racist. I’m not saying he had to try and beat her down, but if your racism consists of throwing your spare protein source at me, then color me unimpressed. However, not all was doom & gloom during day one. Rumors about a surprise mystery guest speaker on Thursday (Sarah Palin? A hologram of Ronald Regan who will crip walk his way off the stage after his speech? A gay person? Seriously, any gay person who is Republican will do) has folks buzzing. Simply put, RNC coverage seems to be taking over the news, so it’s only natch (aka natural) for lil ole Blaria to provide a breakdown of some of the highlights from Day One’s activities.
#1) Southern gospel group The Oak Ridge Boys singing Amazing Grace:
From left to right: Joe Bonsall, Duane Allen, William Lee Golden, and Richard Sterban.
What in low budget, county-fair, cheesy cheddar grits kind of group is this? I’m sorry. I can’t take them seriously when dude on the far right looks like Eugene Levy in a bad wig. I mean, this musical act has “worst case scenario” aka “no other White people wanted to fly down to Tampa during hurricane season to saaaaaang for Romney” written all over them. Obvs, Romney’s peeps can’t book someone like Bruce Springsteen, but they didn’t have to get a bunch of dudes who if someone told me they like to reenact the demise of Hilary Swank’s character in Boys Don’t Cry for fun, my immediate response wouldn’t be, “Duh, bitch.” Okay, okay. Maybe I’m being harsh because I never heard of these cats. Why? Because they sell their music at Cracker Barrel:
Nothing says I made it like having your music sold nationwide at Cracker Barrels.
And The Oak Ridge Boys ain’t ashamed of it either. That Cracker Barrel emblem is the biggest damn image on this ad besides the picture of the group. They have two titans of the digital music world – iTunes & Amazon- and they put shit in tiny high school report footnote font size, so they could let us know that the place where most people go when they’ve been driving on the highway for a couple of hours and need a place to poop is THE place to purchase The Oak Ridge Boys records. Even Romney was probably like, “Man, this is some bullshit.”