I Hit It First is the first single from Ray J’s (aka Brandy’s little brother) upcoming album and despite his claims that the song is not about her, the single’s cover art is clearly a pixelated image of her.
“She might move on to rappers and ballplayers/But we all know I hit it first…I had her head going north and her ass going south/But now baby chose to go West.” ~ said person who breathes oxygen and takes of dumps with the bathroom door open because he enjoys a nice spring breeze caressing his ankles AKA Ray J (I mean, really, am I going to pretend to label him as a rapper or actor or anything that has the semblance of being a job? No, I shall not) as he bragged about how he had sex with Kim Kardashian before her current beau and father of their soon-to-be-born baby, Kanye West, did on the song I Hit It First.
Ray J, the world is not your momma and your dick is not a ten-year-old child who just defeated all the Koopa Troopas for the first time in Super Mario World; therefore, we are not going to take you to Chuck E. Cheese for a pizza party simply because you spooged in a woman. You are thirty-two years old. Please understand that your peen with will go in and out of holes and that action will be treated as unceremoniously as one treats a pile of folded laundry. Clearly, you think differently; otherwise, you wouldn’t have released this song. But I’m here to tell you that despite how “cool” or “edgy” you think you’re being for putting out I Hit It First, you’re actually being fifty shades of trifling.
