Tag Archives: Chik-fil-a

Chick-fil-a, You a Dumb Bitch

25 Jul

Yes, I know this title is mad ignorant, but #TeamBlaria, you should be proud of me because I was literally going to type “youse” instead of “you,” so I could sound like some Italian goombah, but I thought that might be too much. Anyway, as we’re all aware, ever since Chick-fil-a’s president Dan Cathy proudly declared that he’s anti-gay marriage earlier this month, the company has been enduring somewhat of a PR nightmare. First, it was revealed on the Huffington Post website that despite Cathy’s proclamations that his only real concern is maintaining the ideal of the traditional family, Chick-fil-a actually donated nearly $5 million dollars to anti-gay groups and hate groups. Eventually, Cathy owned up to these donations. Then, The Jim Henson Company did the equivalent of a weave snatch during a street fight and announced publicly that they wished to sever their relationship with Chick-fil-a because of their views to which Chick-fil-a responded with this (click on the image to enlarge it and read the text):

Ummmmmmm….

Just like Prince William, we’re all giving Chick-fil-a the royal side eye and smirk combo for that mess of an excuse for recalling Muppet toys. Chick-fil-a issuing the recall after Muppets already told them to go to the left, to the left is like when someone gets dumped and then is like, “Yeah, I was gonna break up with you anyway because you leave dirty drawers all over the apartment.” Bitch, please, quit trying to save face. We all know you didn’t really care about the dirty Fruit of the Looms because you just GChated your friends three days ago about how he’s the one, so go turn on Fleetwood Mac’s Landslide, sit by your windowsill like this is West Side Story, and be sad.

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